Linx/Stuff/Junk & MS Paint Week in Review

This is like a Fruit Rollup of L/S/J greatness. Not only am I going to provide you with some phenomenal links for your Friday, I'll add a couple Paint masterpieces designed by yers truly along the way.

On Monday, TGF wrote out a bunch of questions in his Baseball Digest Daily article, and pretended like he knew all the answers (you've got the card right there in front of you Trebek!). He's either a showoff or a jerk. Well, we're not answering your questions, you showoff jerk!

Tuesday morning, Hack posted the Jones Big ASS Truck Rental & Storage clip. It seems to be popular with the kids, we're getting a bunch of Google hits off of it.

Also on Tuesday I was clued in to the apparent greatness of Restaurant.com. Evidently you can get gift certificates to restaurants in your area (plug in your zip code - there are ones you've actually heard of), at a discounted price. Also, if you enter the promo code SANTA, you get an extra 80% off! For example, you can get a $25 GC to Mike Shannon's for $2. Seriously: $2. The fine print says Valid with a minimum $35 food purchase. 20% gratuity added to pre-discounted check amount, which is workable. This would be a good cheapskate gift for Christmas.

On Wednesday, my InsideSTL article revealed what shitty awards Albert Pu-jolz will be winning this offseason. Within the article I may or may not have inferred that Chris Duncan starred in a porn entitled Dunc in Your Trunk.

Wednesday night I announced that I'll be writing the screenplay to Dunc in Your Trunk. I figure with some upcoming days off, I could finish the script next week. Then Hollywood can come up and film this bad boy in early January. Edit it by the SuperBowl, send to a distributor, and boom - Valentine's Day gift for your loved one. What girl wouldn't want a fake Crush Drunkan porn on the most romantic day of the year? Things like this make me the best at what I do.

In case you missed it, yesterday the big thing going around was Burger King's new flame-broiled meat-scented body spray, Flame. Check it out here. As Sir pointed out a little before press time, this should have been made into a perfume for women, seeing how guys already smell like meat.

And an Abercrombie-wearing k.u.chebag makes his mark on Mizzourah today.

Dats it. Drink up, be merry. Enjoy yourselves!

A Special Linx/Stuff/Junk

Yesterday I realized that I hadn't been putting in the award-winning effort for Bert Flex as I normally do (or at least comparable to this past summer, when I had no life).

And once in a while I can generate some good ideas, so I went to work thinking of what I could offer you for this Friday that would be of any value.

I came up with a new feature, that honestly may only last one week: MS Paint Week in Review. I'll leave it up to the loyal Flexers and our advertisers to see if this should continue into the future. Here goes:

-Monday began MLB's Winter Meetings in Las Vegas. Lil' Kenny Rosenthal got all the best rumors. How does he do it?

-On Tuesday, our own Good Face posted another top notch article on Baseball Digest Daily. I enjoyed the little story about TGF trying to get huuuuge off of Andro. Now he just does it with protein bars and celery sticks.

-All week, I've been having nightmares of Tony La Russa trivia questions haunting me at night. Probably should have hid the box of porn a little better. Or maybe make it not so obvious...

-Wednesday morning, my InsideSTL article laid out my expectations from the Cardinals at the Winter Meetings. Not surprisingly, the Cardinals made no moves. They ended up being in a bunch of SP and RP rumors, but didn't pull the trigger on anything. According to reports, they made a late bid on K-Rod, but fell short. Sure.

-Wednesday night, I "fell short" of eating a salad and green beans for dinner, but went with Wendy's junior bacon cheeseburgers and chicken nuggets instead.

-Thursday night, the ML posted a douchebag report on the ShamWow guy. He's really a tool, and I'm glad the Librarian brought the heat.

-And as always, Mizzourah has some k.u.chebags and a variety of other stuff for your perusal on this lovely Friday. Enjoy the weekend.