Yes, I shamlessly took parts of this from the great baseball fans at homerderby.com and espn.com but I don't care. I thought it justified calling attention to, since we need to book flights, buy game tickets and secure hotel rooms. And since I haven't posted in like months (years?) I figured it would be good to let people know I'm still alive!
Soul Patch Night
April 12, Seattle Mariners
That's right Mariners fans! You don't have to throw away the razor in order to look like your soulful closer, J.J. Putz. They will be handing out 20,000 stick-on versions at the gate. Get 'em while they're hot! (We will see how they fair compared to the Scott Spiezio soul patches of '06). Too bad they play the Angels that night and the chances of Putz actually playing are slim to none. Oopsie. Turns out the game was last night, and he's on the DL. Not sure if the promotion was postponed, but Putz's place on my Fantasy Team lineup certainly has been.
Free Cowbell Night
April 26, Tampa Bay Devil Rays
June 7, Florida Marlins
Is there a more devastating weapon in the fans' arsenal of noisemakers than a cowbell? I cannot WAIT to watch highlights of these games (to note, the Rays play the Red Sox and the Marlins play the Reds- coincidence?)because you really can never have too much cowbell. The Marlins are really going all out this year- from CPA Appreciation Night (June 10th) to their new plus-size, all-male cheerleading squad The Manatees, it makes me almost want to move to Miami just to go to Marlins games. Almost.
Comic Book Night
April 27, Milwaukee Brewers
This is basically an excuse for me to get a picture of my favorite racing sausages up on Bertflex (from left to right- Italian Sausage, Bratwurst, Hot Dog, Polish Sausage, and the newest edition, Chorizio!), but also to give a shout-out to my favorite team. According to milwaukeebrewers.com, the first 10,000 kids 16 and under will get a comic book featuring Rickie Weeks and Corey Hart (of the 'B-Force', naturally) fighting off the evit spit tobacco monster, Grossmouth. You really CANNOT make this stuff up!
Joe Mauer Fishing Lure Night
May 2, Minnesota Twins
Oh man, I wish I was kidding. Catch the Twins in action and then head out to catch your dinner. Yes, Minnesota is the land of 10,000 Lakes. Chances are good, though, that 9,990 of those lakes will still have a foot of snow on them on May 2nd. And let's continue with the obvious: how many times has a team successfully given away something with 6 sharpened barbs on it? Given out to the first 5,000 fans over 18, you just KNOW someone is going to lose any eye. The Twins play the Tigers that night, so maybe it will be Gary Sheffield! I kid, I kid. (Side note: a comment on a message board I was reading about this promotion said that the Twins have given away lures for years in honor of Kent Hrbek. I have never seen them, so therefore don't believe it and deem this a top promotion of the year.)
Soul Patch Night
April 12, Seattle Mariners
That's right Mariners fans! You don't have to throw away the razor in order to look like your soulful closer, J.J. Putz. They will be handing out 20,000 stick-on versions at the gate. Get 'em while they're hot! (We will see how they fair compared to the Scott Spiezio soul patches of '06). Too bad they play the Angels that night and the chances of Putz actually playing are slim to none. Oopsie. Turns out the game was last night, and he's on the DL. Not sure if the promotion was postponed, but Putz's place on my Fantasy Team lineup certainly has been.Free Cowbell Night
April 26, Tampa Bay Devil Rays
June 7, Florida Marlins
Is there a more devastating weapon in the fans' arsenal of noisemakers than a cowbell? I cannot WAIT to watch highlights of these games (to note, the Rays play the Red Sox and the Marlins play the Reds- coincidence?)because you really can never have too much cowbell. The Marlins are really going all out this year- from CPA Appreciation Night (June 10th) to their new plus-size, all-male cheerleading squad The Manatees, it makes me almost want to move to Miami just to go to Marlins games. Almost.Comic Book Night
April 27, Milwaukee Brewers
This is basically an excuse for me to get a picture of my favorite racing sausages up on Bertflex (from left to right- Italian Sausage, Bratwurst, Hot Dog, Polish Sausage, and the newest edition, Chorizio!), but also to give a shout-out to my favorite team. According to milwaukeebrewers.com, the first 10,000 kids 16 and under will get a comic book featuring Rickie Weeks and Corey Hart (of the 'B-Force', naturally) fighting off the evit spit tobacco monster, Grossmouth. You really CANNOT make this stuff up!Joe Mauer Fishing Lure Night
May 2, Minnesota Twins
Oh man, I wish I was kidding. Catch the Twins in action and then head out to catch your dinner. Yes, Minnesota is the land of 10,000 Lakes. Chances are good, though, that 9,990 of those lakes will still have a foot of snow on them on May 2nd. And let's continue with the obvious: how many times has a team successfully given away something with 6 sharpened barbs on it? Given out to the first 5,000 fans over 18, you just KNOW someone is going to lose any eye. The Twins play the Tigers that night, so maybe it will be Gary Sheffield! I kid, I kid. (Side note: a comment on a message board I was reading about this promotion said that the Twins have given away lures for years in honor of Kent Hrbek. I have never seen them, so therefore don't believe it and deem this a top promotion of the year.)
Beerfest
June 21, Oakland A's
Everyone knows this event could in no way work in places like Chicago, Milwaukee, Boston, or St. Louis. But Oakland, thanks to not having a reputation for drunken, disorderly fans (at least compared to the teams mentioned above and others) gets to test out this concept. The game starts at 6pm, but starting at 11 am, fans can come to sample beers and listen to live music. Admission is free with a game ticket, but your souvenier mug will set you back $10- still the cheapest beer you will EVER drink at a ballpark. EVER. Did I mention the A's play the Marlins that night? Surprised- I'm not. If I was stuck with tickets to this stinker of an interleague game, I would want to be hammered too.
Free Money Night
June 28, Cleveland Indians
Yes, that's right. Free. Money. Perhaps the most oxymoronic promotion of the MLB season, but here's the scoop- When you enter Progressive Field (I say 'When you' because I know all of us that read Bertflext will be flocking to Cleveland that weekend in the hopes of striking it rich!) you will be given an envelope. In said envelope could be any amount of money between $1 and $100. If you are lucky enough to receive one of the $100 bills, you are then entered to win the $10,000 grand prize. Sounds easy, right? Well, 32,700 of the 33,000 envelopes they are giving out will contain only 'Progressive Field Fun Money' in $1 or $5 increments that has to be spent that night at the park. Look on the bright side, though, at least your first beer will only cost you $6 instead of $7, or if you're really lucky, $2!Did I miss some?? Yes, a bunch I'm sure, but these are the best I could find (minus Mullet Night in Chicago for a Sox game in July but I could not bring myself to actually posting a picture of a mullet or anything related to the White Sox for that matter. PS- where did mullets rank in our Best Things Eva' Tourney? They had to be a late bust, perhaps they're playing in the NIT somewhere?)
Happy Spring & Baseball Season!
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